Thursday, February 19, 2009

Freeing myself....

This post is about girl stuff, lady problems, that time of the month, Aunt Flo's regular visit, etc etc, and so on and so forth.
Reader discretion is advised.

Click here to escape now.

Proceed with caution!

Click here to turn back now!!!


I don't remember what the date was or even what month it was....or hell, even what season it was...but I do know that the day I got my very first period my mom was on the phone with her cousin Tina.

"Oh! I have to go! Jessica just got her period!"

Eh. Thanks mom. A little discretion....(she says on her public blog)

Anyway, those first wonderful humiliations aside....becoming a woman was everything and nothing I hoped it would be. First of all I was like 12, not exaaaactly "woman" material. Secondly, from the onset it was terrible. Crampy, icky, messy, inconvenient and expensive. Tampons aren't free you know!

At 13 I had a period that lasted THREE WEEKS! That sucked.

Beyond that one anomaly though, everything was regular and on schedule. But MY regular was a terrible monthly ordeal, lasting a week, debilitating me, making me tired and bitchy, giving me and everyone around me a major problem.

That is until I realized very late into my womanhood that I could take my birth control pills forever and never stop thus never getting a period.

Nowadays this is called Seasonale....back in the day it was called crazy! Genius! Dangerous! Brilliant!! etc etc....

I did that for awhile. It somewhat helped. They recommend a "hormone holiday" so I'd do that. Ugh. It was still awful.

Anyway....Since I got pregnant with my first child in about June 2003 I estimate that I've had about a third of the lady cycles that I should have had. In almost six years, I've had maybe 24 actual periods, all of which have been heinous. Some accompanied by ovarian cysts, some just flat out debilitating. Thank god for tons of babies and breastfeeding!

After Ben started to cut down his nursings late last year, my Aunt Flo returned home, just after Christmas...oh, holly joy!!

This first meeting after almost a year and a half absence wasn't the worst thing ever, but man, was I annoyed.

I mean, I did have my tubes tied about 5 minutes after Ben was born. So, what the hell was I going through this for anymore???

Fear of procedures kept me from pursuing my thoughts of freedom.

Then February came....ugh.
Suffice it to say, yuck.
I decided halfway through my second period in 17 months that I was DONE! D-O-N-E.
I scheduled a consult with my OB ASAP.

That consult was today.
A quick meeting with my longtime OB who delivered both my sons and clipped my fallopian tubes last May resulted in the scheduling of a wondrous and fabulous procedure for me. I'm getting an HTA or a hydrothermal endometrial ablation.

My procedure is set for April 7th. I'm VERY excited. If I get the outcome I want, I will never ever ever get another period again.
Since I'm having no more babies there's really no point. Finally I'll be free!

Not that I would, but I can wear WHITE JEANS! Whenever I want!
Not that I want to. ;)
I can toss out the granny panties! The Midol! The Pamprin! The Extra Super Tampax!
Buh bye!
I'm seriously so excited!

So that date will mark the end of an era for me. A journey that began 18 or some odd years ago and will hopefully end on April 7, 2009.

Join me in hoping for the best!


Susie said...

My fingers are crossed.. I haven't had a cycle in 5 years. It is like heaven. :D

Andrea said...

That is awesome Jessey! I hope it all goes well and you never have another monthly visit again! I have had some pretty heavy and heinous periods in the past year and just had mirena put in a few months ago. So far it's been wonderful, still getting periods, but so so light and easy. Phew!

Jessica said...

My doc said that if it doesn't work my insurance will even pay to repeat the procedure three months, it's totally a go!

Crystal said...

I'm glad to hear I'm not the only one with these sorts of stories. I learned my lesson with the Depo shot--NEVER AGAIN! It caused me serious bleedage. As in, sit on the toilet for an hour periods.

I hope that wasn't too graphic!

I can't wait to hear how this turns out for you Jess!

Jessica said...

Since revealing my decision to get this procedure done, I've heard SO many stories from so many ladies who have had the same experience that I have had with my "Monthly Visitor"

It's a shame that for whatever reason we women feel ashamed about something that is part of human nature. Men certainly don't feel shame about farting!

We have even less control over our periods!

I'm just so glad that this procedure has been developed. Twenty years ago, I'd have to have a hysterectomy to end this torture...or suffer on.

PS Crystal, seriously nothing on this blog is ever too graphic or TMI. My feeling is, if I'M comfortable saying it and you're comfortable saying it, it's A-OK.
Anyone who is like "ew gross periods!" should have clicked on the puppy dogs!

Jessica said...

Oh and PS, Depo made me such a fucking psycho bitch, no lie.