Monday, July 17, 2006

I have won so many lotteries!

Yes, it is true. According to my email, I have won the Nigerian lottery, the Australian lottery and many others that I did not even enter! I must be very very lucky.

I also must be an internationally known financier since I got this email today from Nigeria:

Dear friend,
I am Prof. Charles C. Soludo the Governor, Central Bank of Nigeria (CBN). Forgive my indignation if this massage comes to you as a surprise and if it might offend you without your prior consent and writing through this channel. I write to seek your partnership in business/investments for a reliable foreign business partner into whose account i will transfer a huge amount of money for an offshore investment. The fund came as overinvoiced contracts and has been abandoned as unclaimed funds to our escrow account since the officials that overinvoiced the contract are no longer in service. I will give you the details of the contract to apply for the remittance of the fund to you as the beneficiary. After fund is transferred to your destination bank account, you shall keep for me and my colleagues 60% of the fund while 30% will be for you and your family and 10% to cover all expenses.
Meanwhile, I would like to invest my share in a joint partnership participation in manufacturing companies in your country or any lucrative business of your advise.
Feel free to contact me via my most confidential email address: http://us.f536.mail.yahoo.com/ym/Compose?To=profcscbn2006@yahoo.com to ask for more clarification as the case may be.
Be assured that this proposition / transaction is absolutely risk free and should be kept confidential. There is no risk involved nor whatsoever.
Looking forward to further co-operation, and will be grateful for
your immediate response.
Yours faithfully.
Prof. Charles C. Soludo
Governor, Central Bank Of Nigeria



Wowee wow! That "massage" did come as a surprise. Of course, I'm going to email the Professor because not only is the proposition/transaction absolutely risk free there is also no risk involved nor whatsoever! That's fancy talk!

My reputation as a trusted business partner must have become even MORE well known this afternoon because soon after reading the first, I got THIS email:

HELLO DEAR,
I AM MRS LUISA EJERCITOR ESTRADA , THE WIFE OF MR JOSEPH ESTRADA THE FORMER PRESIDENT OF PHILIPPINES LOCATED IN THE SOUTH EAST ASIA. MY HUSBAND WAS IMPEACHED FROM OFFICE BY A BACKED UP RISING OF THE SENATE.DURING MY HUSBAND'S REGIME AS PRESIDENT OF PHILIPPINES I REALISED THE SUM OF US$ 12MILLION USD(TWELVE UNITED STATES DOLLARS) FROM VARIOUS CONTRACT PROJECTS I EXECUTED SUCCESSFULY, I HAD PLANED LONG AGO TO INVEST THIS MONEY OUT SIDE MY COUNTRY WITH THE HELP OF A TRUSTED PERSON ABROAD.

THE FUNDS WAS DEPOSITED IN A SECURITY CARRIER COMPANY ABROAD AS VALUBLES WHEN HE WAS IN POWER AS THE PRESIDENT OF PHILIPPINES. NOW EVER SINCE THE ARREST AND DETENTION OF MY HUSBAND, ALL OUR ASSETS HAVE BEEN CONFISCATED BY THE PHILIPPINES GOVERNMENTS, MY FAMILY'S LIFE STYLE IS BEEN MONITORED AND ALL MY TELECOMMUNICATIONS IS BEEN BUGGED INTO PHILIPPINES SECURITY SERVICES.

THIS FUND IS THE ONLY BULK SUM LEFT FOR US NOW WHICH THE GOVERNMENT HAVE NOT AND WILL NOT DISCOVER. ALL I WANT NOW IS A REPUTABLE HAND THAT CAN ASSIST ME CLEAR THE FUND FROM THE SECURITY COMPANY, I AM READY TO GIVE OUT A GREATER PERCENTAGE OF THIS FUNDS FOR THE ASSISTANCE.THE SECURITY COMPANY DOES NOT KNOW THE CONTENTS OF THE CONSIGNMENTS BECAUSE IT WAS MOVED THROUGH A DIPLOMATIC MEANS BY A NON GOVERNMENTAL ORGANIZATION (NGO).

ALL I WANT FROM YOU NOW, IS YOUR COMPLETE NAME, ADDRESS WITH PHONE AND FAX NUMBERS,AFTER WHICH I WILL CONTACT THE COMPANY AND FORWARD YOUR CONTACT THROUGH EMAIL TO THEM AND CHANGE OF OWNERSHIP OF THE SAID CONSIGNMENTS BE EFFECTED TO YOUR NAME. AS SOON AS THIS CHANGE IS MADE IN YOUR NAME, YOU WILL HAVE THE LEGAL RIGHT TO TALK TO THE SECURITY COMPANY FOR THE RELEASE OF THE CONSIGNMENT ON MY BEHALF.

SEND TO ME A LETTER OF ACCEPTANCE IF YOU ARE WILLING TO ASSIST, AND I WANT YOU TO KNOW THAT I HAVE A GREAT REPUTATION IN THE SOCIETY, SO THIS TRANSACTION MUST BE KEPT CONFIDENTIAL. THERE SHOULD BE NO THIRD PARTY IN THIS TRANSACTION UNTILL YOU HAVE CLEARED THIS CONSIGNMNETS FROM THE SECURITY COMPANY AND TAKE MY INSTRUCTIONS ON HOW IT WILL BE INVESTED, MAINLY IN THE REAL ESTATE BUSINESS.

I HEREBY AWAIT YOUR URGENT RESPONSE, AND YOU WILL BE TAKING INSTRUCTIONS FROM ME AT ALL TIMES TO AVOID MISTAKES . YOU HAVE TO BE COMMITTED AND DEDICATED TO THIS BUSINESS, I HOPE TO INVITE YOU TO PHILIPPINES FOR A VISIT WHEN THIS TRANSACTION IS OVER AND WE ARE FREE FROM THE GOVERNMENT. I AM WAITING FOR YOUR URGENT RESPONSE, REGARDS,

DR. MRS LUISA ESTRADA



I can't WAIT to visit the Phillippines located in the South East Asia! It will be such fun!

9 comments:

Amy said...

Somebody came in to our office once and wanted to hire us to draft a contract to give to the Nigerians to collect the money.

Jessey said...

I was in the bank once and this very very old man was there to make sure that he would be able to get the transfer of his lottery winnings. He had already given out his bank account number to the scammers.

So sad.
I never thought people could fall for such a thing, but it must work because they keep sending those emails out. I get a ton of them. Thank goodness for my internet only email, it's the only one that gets clogged up with that crap.

Amy said...

Sometimes I feel bad for the people. Other times I think, if you are so stupid that you think some person you've never met is going to give you their money to "hold" and then let you share in it, you deserve whatever happens to you.

Freebird said...

And people get scammed this like every day.

Jessey said...

Once you consider that statistically half the population has a below average IQ, it becomes easier to understand why and how these types of scams work.

eaf said...

This makes me WAY sadder than the woman with a million babies post. Somebody hooked these people up with a computer so they could get MORE from life, and look at how other human beings take advantage. :-(

Jessey said...

Yep. The scum rises to the top of the pond.

Anonymous said...

This has become so rampant, it's begun a counter-craze of it's own. Scambaiting.
http://www.419eater.com/

There's even a book being published on it. Sounds like fun!
Erin

Jessey said...

Funny!