Tuesday, February 20, 2007

Is there a Brady bun in the oven???

Bridget Moynahan's publicist has announced that she is preggo-tastic with the spawn of New England Patriots quarterback Tom Brady.

Holy paternity test Pat-man!

Methinks someone should have been a little more cautious with their precautions, ahem, Tom.
A bastard baby is probably the last thing this dude needs. He's a rich, famous, hot, young guy. He's dating friggin Gisele. Don't get me wrong Bridget Moynahan is hot too. She was in Coyote Ugly for goodness sakes! She played Mr. Big's wife on SATC!!

She's gonna be ROLLING in the dough with this kid. Just like Matt Leinart's out of wedlock bundle of joy.
Good job Bridget! The gigs dry up so you gotta get knocked up fo' the do'. I understand.

The only thing that's even REMOTELY shocking about this story is that Bridget Moynahan is 37 years old. THIRTY SEVEN!
She looks 25.
Brady's only 30. Looks about 30.
He had to know that this chick's eggs were drying up and she would get crazy. That's probably why they split in the first place, she wants kids, he doesn't. Blam. End-o.

Maybe she thought he'd be happy once she DID get knocked up and they'd marry, but it backfired and he dumped her before she even KNEW she was preggo. Maybe she didn't save his sperm in a condom and turkey baste herself after the fact just as a big, one last FUCK YOU to the cockiest dude alive.

Only time will tell.

Maybe Larry Birkhead is the father of this kid as well. Who knows?


Anonymous said...

Maybe he broke up with her because she was pregnant, and then his dating Giselle so quickly pissed her off so she decided to blab it. And if she didn't know, well that's gonna make a lot of people re-think the sympathy screw you do right before parting ways.

Jessica said...

I just heard on the radio that Tom Brady is "excited" that she's having his little bastard baby...


Main Entry: ex·cite
Pronunciation: ik-'sIt, ek-
Function: transitive verb
Inflected Form(s): ex·cit·ed; ex·cit·ing
Etymology: Middle English, from Anglo-French exciter, from Latin excitare, from ex- + citare to rouse -- more at CITE
a : to call to activity
b : to rouse to an emotional response
c : to arouse (as a strong emotional response) by appropriate stimuli
b : to produce a magnetic field in
3 : to increase the activity of (as a living organism) : STIMULATE
4 : to raise (as an atomic nucleus, an atom, or a molecule) to a higher energy level
synonym see PROVOKE

Jessica said...

Doesn't say ANYTHiNG about "happy"

Anonymous said...

Who says they are excited about the fact that they just found out their ex-girlfriend is knocked up. Happy to be a father, although sad it happened at this time. Maybe. Excited? No.

Jessica said...

That was my point, the definition of excited just means an agitated state of some sort, it doesn't presuppose any positive or negative slant to that state.

It was a good choice of words. Excited, instead of say "thrilled"
"pleased" or "happy"

Anonymous said...

Ha, I relayed this to my husband last night. He said, "I'd be excited too." I said, "oh you loser, you just jinxed us, your ex is going to e-mail you again tomorrow and tell you she's kept a secret for the past 8 years. And I for one will NOT be excited."