Thursday, March 19, 2009

ANTM: Cycle 12 - Third Elimination

If you're like me, you're still trying to sort out who is who on this show.
This is the first week I've remembered all the girls names! Some of them are just getting far less airtime than others.
My girl Natalie stepped up the bitch game this week when she showed the other girls how to walk runway prior to the actual runway lesson from Miss J.

Uh, yeah, so many things wrong with that.

A) When you get up there and say, "you all should do this this and this", you look like a total wanker bitch.
B) WHY would you help out your competition, especially this early in the game, ESPECIALLY with something you claim to be the best at, ESPECIALLY when you think there might be a challenge elimination this week. Dumb dumb dumb. But whoever said that models were the brightest chicks around?

After her tutorial on how to model, Natalie called out Tahlia for having no confidence. Yeah, pick on the burn victim. Now you're the No. 1 jerk in the house. And while sometimes the real jerky girls get far (Jade, Bianca, Renee and Bre come to mind) Natalie is no Jade. Hell, she's no Renee - who got robbed by the way.

Back on topic.
The actual runway lesson was hilarious. All the girls in twinsets, black pumps and pearls and Miss J working the society matron look. Hysterical.
Some of the girls whose walks were a hot mess: Kortnie, Tahlia and mooneyed Allison.
Natalie, of course, rocked it and went on to win the runway competition (a Jill Stuart fashion show) despite swirling midway down the runway.
Wait, I thought swirling was good? Well, it was a few cycles back anyway....

The photo shoot took place atop a double decker sightseeing bus (though a couple shots were taken off the bus, which makes no sense but whatever). The girls had to evoke characters based on New York landmarks, like Wall Street and Times Square.
These are the types of shoots where when a picture goes bad you can't really blame the models. I mean, who came up with the character of Two Nannies Ignoring the Baby. No wonder that picture was terrible in its ability to tell that story, bleh. At least they looked good.

By far the worst shot though was Kortnie and Nijah's SoHo Artists shot. Fug fug fug. Didn't tell the story and wasn't visually appealing.
The judges also ripped London and Allison's photo of snooty socialites, though I thought they pulled it off. At one point they said Allison looked like an Olsen Twin. Hello, those Olsen twins are total snooty rich socialites. We can't all be Gossip Girl.

They also criticized Natalie for not being believeable as a tourist. Well, she clearly isn't the golden child anymore. Crap! I hope she breaks down and cries next week.

PS I can't believe Fo didn't get called out first. Her picture as a Wall Street Broker was awesome. Instead it was Sandra, who was in the aforementioned ineffective nannies shot. Whatever. This show makes no sense.

Call Out Order:
Tahlia (WHAT?)
Kortnie (who we barely saw all episode and who's picture was a drag)

Leaving us with a bottom three of Natalie, Allison and Nijah.
Uh oh.

Despite being unbelieveable, Natalie is safe.
Allison has such a unique look but can't translate it to film. Nijah is gorgeous but models like a corpse.
Naturally Allison is safe, and since Nijah can't smile with her eyes or really her mouth either, she's sent packing.

Who will go next week? Can Natalie and Allison get back to their former glory? Will Kortnie finally get kicked off the show already! She's horrible!
Tune in next Wednesday on the CW.


Sharlene said...

Hilarious! I had no idea that you had a blog or that you were as obsessed with ANTM as I am. Sweet. Fun fact: back in my real estate days I sold a house to the guy who does all the music for the show. Oh yeah. I am that cool.

Jessica said...

Obsessed is such a harsh word!