Friday, October 16, 2009

It was bound to happen someday

Elizabeth has not been feeling well these last few days. A sore throat, turned into fever, turned into some sort of croupy nightmare.

Last night she took a hot bath to alleviate all those symptoms.
Afterwards she wanted to change into totally different pajamas. I told her to forget it because I didn't want her rifling through the laundry baskets destroying the delicate order of the clothes just to change unnecessarily.

About a half hour later she tried to convince me to let her change again.

"Mom," she croaked. "There is a spot on my pajamas. I better change."

"No Liz," I said. "You will live with a tiny spot on your PJs. You do not need to change."

"Mom," she said in her 'OK here's the deal' voice.
She motioned to me "That is your body."
She motioned to herself "And THIS is my body. You're in charge of your body. And I am in charge of my body. So I can do whatever I want."

"No no no little girl," I said.
I pointed to her.
"That body's existence is SUBSIDIZED by this body," I pointed to myself. "and THAT body," I pointed to her father.
"So until you start paying rent, half the utilities, buying your own food and cooking it and driving yourself around town, WE are in charge of THAT little body and YOU will do what WE say you will do, not whatever you want to do. You got that?"

She shook her tiny head as if to say, "Oh mother, you really do not know anything" and tried to rekindle her opposition but I cut her off.

"You are NOT changing because there is a speck of a spot on your PJs. End of discussion."

And as that familiar phrase spilled from my lips, I became my mother.

6 comments:

Anonymous said...

Well, her body DOES belong to her. But the clothes are definitely yours. So you still win.

Jessica said...

You know what is so funny. While she was saying all that I was actually really proud of her for knowing that she is the owner/operator of her own body.

You'll note I didn't say, "nuh uh you belong to me girlfriend" but rather that we were "in charge" which is to say, we're responsible for you and for good reason.

She'd feed herself Airheads and Chicken Nuggets washed down with Dr. Pepper for every meal and wear the same iCarly T-shirt every day if SHE was in charge at this point in her life.

Anonymous said...

Yeah, somebody taught her good. But, as I was just re-reading this, I realized - you want her to pay HALF the utilities. That is more than her fair share for a 5 person household! I'd change unnecessarily too if I were being ripped off.

Andrea said...

Thanks for the chuckle! I have a feeling I'm going to have a conversation like that with Ava sooner than later. Also, I'm surprised it's taken you nearly six years to turn into your mother...I think I changed about four years in. ;)

Jessica said...

I'm also glad that when the time comes for Elizabeth to finally seek her emancipation she will have a GREAT lawyer in Amy! :)

PS You'll see how much power those dang kids can lay out in one day...far greater than her 1/5 share.

You've still got total control over all things electrical....give it another year. :)

Dre: It's been an evolving process, but this was the clincher...you know....

"End of discussion"

((((shudder))))

JD said...

I commend you for your comeback. I would have been laughing hysterically and wouldn't have been able to think of anything to say. But, Elizabeth obviously gets her wit from you, so you are raising a worthy competitor.