A few bad days....

So while Bob was out of town I didn't get to exercise as much as I want to, I was waaay more worn out from dealing with the kids solo and I ate whatever I could grab.

BAD BAD BAD!

I ate Beefaroni. Ugh. It made me feel sick.

Of course, now I feel all dejected and depressed about that since I'm determined to not turn 31 and still be all baby fat and lumpy. Blech.

BUT! Instead of moping around and eating Pop Tarts, I'm going to get back into the groove and work out today and not sneak in high calorie foods and then "forget" to log them on my calorie counter.

Sigh.

Why am I sabotaging my own success??

Reporting my Success

I have been diligent about working out every day, I have watched my portion sizes, I have drank water and forsaken all other forms of hydration.

I have lost 4.6 pounds since Thursday.

You may cheer for me now!

I'm really encouraged by the quick results I'm seeing and it's just confirmation that my body is ready to shed the baby weight, I don't need it anymore and it's time to let go of it all.

Progress....

Since I got the new scale I've already lost two pounds! Yay!
I've been working out for an hour every day. It's great!
Now to just keep it up!

Ok, that's it, no more messing around....

Ben is almost eight months old and I'm still not getting anywhere on shedding the post-preg poundage. Not cool.

This fricking cold and ear infection is now the only thing in my way. Once I kick this, it's on!

Yesterday I used my WalMart gift cards from Christmas to get myself a fancy new digital scale that records my weight AND weight loss automatically. I've already got my start weight in there and it's no bueno.

I have all these excuses for why I'm not doing better for myself...the kids, the housework, the lack of time, the weather...it's all bullshit.
I have time, I put off housework for lesser reasons (like blogging), I have a Jeep stroller that the boys can strap into and run the park with me, I have exercise equipment at home for bad weather days....
I've just been lazy, dreading working out and all that. But enough is enough. I'm not happy with myself at all, and it has to stop.

So, yeah, that's that.

Buh Bye Baby Stuff

There are several things going on at the Evans Homestead presently...the most apparent of which is something I like to call The Great Baby Stuff Purge!
Since we're not having another baby, we can now safely dispose of, donate, lend out and hand down ALL the baby clothes, gear and accessories.
Thankfully, fate and fortune have aligned and there are no less than five pregnant ladies who are currently in the circle of trust.
A few of these ladies don't really need the donations, and are so far away as to make it not feasible, but they are still in the circle and shall be acknowledged! Shout out to AM and Mer!

Locally we have three four! available drop off points for baby stuff...a friend of mine, a mom from Elizabeth's class (oh wait, two moms!) and our possible future SIL. Sigh.
I'm also a big huge fan of bagging up clothes and donating them to Salvation Army or Big Brothers Big Sisters (which is huge up here) and letting them figure out what to do with them.
I'd estimate that I donate 6 bags (giant trash bags) full of clothes every year. We also GET a lot of hand-me-downs. I also donate shoes and silly toys we hate or are far too loud and annoying...etc. etc. Nice tax write-off, not that I need it.

Currently in our front room are two huge gift bags full of boy baby clothes, a baby bouncer seat, a swing, a bassinet and several assorted huge baby toys for my brother in law's impending infant. Yes! We FINALLY moved Ben out of the bassinet, which he outgrew oh, two months ago. Whoops!

Also ready to be lent out is a very nice port-a-crib which is slated to go to my friend Mandi after she moves into her new house.

This is very sad to me, since giving away my baby stuff is like saying all over again NO MORE BABIES. However, all these new babies coming into the world who I can enjoy and play with and snuggle and then go home without them, I like that too.

Which leads me to...I hate these celeb-moms who have a baby and then two months later are all skinny and flab free. F-off! Jessica Alba! I'm talking to you!
I wasn't model thin before kids, nor was I perfect in EVERY way, but still. My body is a hot mess now after three pregnancies in five years. A. Hot. Mess.

This morning I yawned in front of a full length mirror...never a good look even when you are Angelina Jolie. Anyway, my shirt crept up as I stretched, revealing the sad affair that is my tummy.
Egad!
I better get a piggy bank and start saving now for my plastic surgery...seriously. That tummy is totally not acceptable.
I don't want to look 15 again (maybe I do) and there's no way I ever could...too many bones to break to put me back together that tight ever again. But crap. Could I not look like I was just run over repeatedly with a meat tenderizer? That would rock.

Ben is 5.5 months old and it's time for me to seriously get back to working out, for reals. For REALLY REALS! Finally get this 20 pounds OFF of me! Then maybe try for 10 more.
Then when I finally DO hit the lottery/win at the casino/hit oil in my yard and have my fortune amassed I'll have that much less to do in the way of plastic surgery and I can spend my dollaz on bling.

The Six Week Weigh In: Frustrating and Annoying

First let me say that I am totally irritated with my scale, I think it is a piece of junk and I despise it. When I say junk, I mean shit, and I mean it like this "SHIT!"
Not just because I have not lost any weight this week...but because I have NO IDEA what I weigh at all because every time I step on the scale I get a different result. Bah!
All the numbers I'm getting are jumping around in the same five-pound range as last week, so I assume that I weigh the same as last week...though there's really no way to tell at all.

That's the baddest news.
Here's the bad news...I'm going to have to revise my weight loss plan entirely, seeing as how I seem totally incapable of budging the scale at all these last three weeks. It's really screwed me up plan-wise!
Maybe it's not advisable to try to lose weight while I'm nursing at all. Maybe I'm stressing on it unnecessarily right now when I should be focusing on other more important things.

I mean, I've already come a long way. Regardless of what the stupid scale says, I'm thinner and leaner than I was six weeks ago (obviously!) and I don't have that far to go to get back to the weight I was before I got pregnant. That is all good news.

Here is the best news...
Despite my complete fear of not fitting into them, I tried on a few pairs of the cute pants I bought last summer when I was skinnier. THEY FIT!!
Yay!
I'm even wearing a pair of "skinny" pants right now as I type! Yay!

That puts me in clothes that are just two sizes bigger than what I wore in college my sophomore year when I worked out twice a day over the summer and got myself a nice eating disorder (coffee and tomatoes anyone) and got my body down to 135 pounds and STILL thought I was a fat cow.
I hate that girl. HATE! Not because she's a skinny bitch and still complains but because she had no freaking fun because she was way too concerned about what everyone was thinking about her all the time 24/7. As if anyone was as preoccupied with the size of her booty and the perceived lumpiness of her belly as she was.
Gah. Get over yourself!! I wish I could go back in time and shake myself!

Oh, and I'm also just one size bigger than I was when I graduated and when I met Bob, though somehow I'm 20-25 pounds heavier now than I was then, I think. That doesn't seem right! Right?
Maybe the scales have never worked correctly for me?

So, big picture now...
I've still got a lot of work to do. My long-term goal is the same, the same end-weight, which, fine I'll just say it, is 150 pounds.
Doing the cheap math, you'll see that I now weigh 175 pounds, or thereabouts (stupid scale) which is friggin' hideous and obese!! Blech.
Today I wear a size 16. But hey, I can also wear junior size 17 or 19 which kicks ass because I HATE old lady clothes and junior sizes are cut for narrow hipped skinny hos who have no kids and I have three kids and .... hold please .... 44 inch hips over the bones (which incidentally are not even padded with fat but rather poking out so figure THAT out).

There, all my cards are on the table...
I've spoken the numbers that dare not be spaked, spoken ...said.

Do you still love me? :)

PS - I don't know if Eleeza is out there or elsewhere, but she will remember hopefully that when I got measured for my wedding dress I had 45 inch hips and it almost made me cry, and that was (presumably) five pounds LIGHTER than I am now.
So boo-yah engaged me! I'm slightly smaller than you! Shazam!

Feeling better...

The temperature has been less oppressive these last two days which has helped me to not dehydrate entirely. Whoo hoo!
I've been more vigilant about watering myself, which has really improved my mood. No more cramps and headaches. Yay!

As a preview to my weigh-in tomorrow I will now tell you how lazy I was all week.

My only actual day of exercise was Monday. I Gazelled for a half hour while watching "Big Fish" on TV.
Tuesday no formal exercise at all, though I did clean and chase kids. I THINK this was the evening that we walked around in the yard at night, I had the baby wrapped to me. Though, all the days are seeming to run together. Ah, monotony.

Wednesday I went through the whole day thinking it was Tuesday, just FYI. I took all three kids to Wal-Mart, enough exercise for one day! Walking around Wal-Mart for an hour with the baby wrapped is pretty decent cardio.

Thursday was the day we went to the park and hung out with pals. After that I went to Basha's (a supermarket chain in Arizona) and shopped for about an hour with the baby wrapped. It was VERRRRRY hot on this day.

Friday was my insane cleaning morning, which was very taxing on my system as evidenced by my total physical collapse later on that day.

Saturday (yesterday) I tried to recover from Friday. No exercise, though again I cleaned and chased kids.

Today isn't over yet! We have decided to take the kids to the Ghost of the Coyote trail nearby and hike and picnic a bit. That should be fun (if it comes to pass). You know me and our planned activities...they never seem to happen!

If we don't go I'm definitely going to work out a bit tonight on the Gazelle. Just so I have something to write in my exercise book.

I still think I'll have lost weight this week because
A) my clothes are getting ever looser
B) I've really been watching my food intake
C) I was sick that one day
and D) I'm optimistic.

Here are some interesting facts I have learned about breastfeeding and weight loss.

*It takes about 250-500 calories a day to produce milk.
*In women with fat stores (most women!) up to 200 of those calories will come from burning up that fat. Neat!
*Nursing moms can safely lose about 1-2 pounds a week without diminishing milk supply.

Pass it on!

Rambling on...and on...

Well, I've done it!
I've reached my first goal of dropping 20 pounds by my three week checkup!! Yahoooooo!!!!

Now the REAL weight loss work will begin. That first 20 pounds was the easy part, the weight of the actual baby himself and the reduction of the preggo swelling.

Though, that 20 pounds is nothing to sneeze at. Lots of postpartum gals find it hard to budge one pound off their butts after having a baby. I think the multiple insane children I'm herding around plus the endless daily chores have helped me to quickly reduce my weight.
Like I said before, I'm not exactly restricting my diet as I'm nursing and that is ill-advised. I need 500 more calories per day over my pre-pregnancy diet, which was ridiculously restricted. That said, I don't count calories either. I merely take note of caloric content and hope my guilt will guide me to the celery.
Did you know, for instance that there are almost 200 calories in 40 shelled roasted peanuts. An interesting fun fact for you.
Isn't it also funny that "shelled" means "unshelled" like flammable and inflammable mean the same thing? Weird.

Anyway.
My major life change during Operation New Hotness is working out. Every day. EVERY EVERY DAY. Moving my butt around every day.
Totally doable.
Especially on days when I'm literally single-handedly propelling a metal shopping cart loaded with 70 pounds of children and additional poundage of groceries WHILE simultaneously carrying another 8 pounds of child. That's a killer workout. Great for the abs. I joke. Great for the lats.

I have my silly Gazelle set up in my room, it's like walking with no impact. Great! I Gazelled for a half hour this morning.

When Law and Order comes on later, I'll probably do another half hour, during the Order part, which I consider to be the part where the cops are investigating. The Law portion is the part in the courtroom...right?
Ah, who cares, as long as Jesse Martin is in the episode.
Lord have mercy, that man is a tall drink of water.
So what if I'm married and he might be gay, or not. We could make it work!
Just because he was gay in "Rent" that doesn't mean anything...

Wow. I'm way off track...

In additional child and family news, we had a not great night last night. First off, the kitties killed something that we can't find. All I heard was high-pitched squeaking. Bob went to investigate and there were no kitties and no carcasses. He thinks they brought their "friend" outside to finish off. I hope so!
There is also a small lizard living under my computer hutch. He came out yesterday afternoon, briefly, then ran back underneath.
Hopefully, he'll be discovered soon and disposed of, otherwise I'll have to move furniture to remove him.

Midway through the night, Dylan woke up crying and screaming. I was up with the baby so Bob had to go calm Dylan down, which happened pretty quickly.
However, a few hours later Dylan was up again and roaming the house. Bob again had to intervene, this time a bit less happily.
Then Benjamin started fussing. By that point, Bob had a pillow and a comforter over his head. Poor dear.
I haven't slept through the night for over three weeks though, so Bob can sort of suck an egg on this one. I can't feel sorry for his one night of constant interruptions, I just can't work it up.

I've got to put a sleeping baby back into his bed now. He likes to hang out with me while I blog. I think the typing relaxes him.
Later.

EXTREME Fat Smash - One week update

So I've been doing the Extreme Fat Smash diet for a week now...
It's been going well. The first few days I was starving! I munched on celery all day practically. But now I've adjusted to the new lower caloric intake.
Oh, that and I cheat.
Shhh. Don't tell Harvey the drill sergeant!
I don't cheat that badly. I still eat healthy crap. I still eat the right portion sizes. I still do the exercise. And that's all that matters, right?

Whatever.
It's working. I've already lost six pounds! In a week!!!
Just 24 more to go to reach my goal! Whoooooooo!

It's helps that Elizabeth asks me while I'm exercising "WHY are you working out? Are you fat?"
And I have to say, "yeah....." sob sob sob.